So in this video I know I would like to give you an overall goal setting framework and the right note
that mentioned at the start the section that this is going to be one of the latest sections in the course
and believe it or not it really genuinely is.
All right.
The problem and any life coaching relationship isn't so much setting goals.
All right.
Most people already have a set of goals.
Most people already know what they want.
If a person's coming to you saying I have some nasty feelings make these feelings go away.
Refer them on to a therapist or someone who deals with that kind of stuff.
All right.
Goal setting is or blame life coaching is always going to be more proactive a future focused by nature.
So if a person doesn't have a goal or a sense of it or destination that they want to pursue and reach
in life and there's not really much we can do them anyway.
All right.
So it may be the case that a client will come to us sometimes and they're going to be massively stressed
because they are super proactive but they're trying to be super proactive in all different areas of
life at exactly the same time.
And they're just ending up and experiencing this degree of overwhelm and again this is a common factor
that leads people to kind of have complete breakdowns at some certain stages of life.
So I want to look at just what we've looked at so far and give you a kind of like a five stage framework
for understanding how these exercises that have shared set end to the overriding goals and process if
that makes sense.
First things first.
We've had to look at how it is that we get a vision for our life.
Now I've suggested that we start with the end in mind and we'll look at how it is we want to be remembered.
This is always going to give us a really healthy perspective and context the reason why we're going
to be doing what we're doing or it's going to help our clients to remain grounded when we have a vision
for our futures kind of like that one that I've just shared with you i.e. a tombstone this kind of becomes
our unique reference point.
Right.
Remember that idea back in Section 5 of the course.
And when we talked about getting a unique reference point for our future this kind of brings the rest
of her life into balance.
Well sometimes all that we really need to do when we are finding ourselves in a place of turmoil or
chaos in life and we all find ourselves in places like this at times we just need to remember why we're
here right.
What are this we actually want to be remembered for.
And then this alone can sometimes give us a basis for making really wise and well-informed decisions
about those things that we say yes to things we say no to things we pursue aren't things that we don't.
All right.
Really allows us to help us keep our priorities in check.
So first things first we want to get a vision for our life is one of the first things we want to be
doing know what I'm not seeing is that the life coaching process is as I've laid it out through this
course.
All right.
What I'm saying is that you've got to discern where your clients are.
You've got to be able to read where they are and you're going to be able to read by asking them good
questions.
What I might sometimes do is share the the goals and workbook with a client before I even get started
with them or I say for example Klein gets in touch with me and says K. And I want to come for some life
coaching.
I just feel like my life has fallen apart and that is what many clients will incidentally come to you
with.
Well you can't do anything for someone whose life's fallen apart but what you can give them is a life
balance workbook so that we can start getting clear on the specific areas in their life that they are
feeling or sensing.
They have a bit of a deficit.
All right.
So when they do come to you eventually got goals.
They are a lot clearer within themselves so that you then know what you're actually working with.
You got me.
All right cool.
So first things first.
Our clients actually need to know what they want.
All right.
Not what they don't want.
Remember we've got to be focusing on goals are framed in the positive.
All right if a clients come and say I don't want to feel stressed anymore.
Well that's fantastic.
But I can't help you get on stressed.
All right.
I can help you work towards a goal.
Got plenty of framework so but I can't help you manage your emotions that's down to you.
People will naturally gravitate towards those things that they focus on the most.
So if a person is focused and feeling stressed.
So I thought what if he was stressed.
What if he was stressed.
Oh my goodness I do want to feel stressed and I'm just using stress as the example here.
People sometimes end up get themselves even more stressed.
But when a person is focusing on I want to be remembered as a as a loving as a caring as a compassionate
passionate generous giving person.
Well it provokes us to make totally different types of decision doesn't it about you know how we are
on a day to day basis for other people.
Right.
So obviously we look in two totally different ends of the spectrum here.
So once a client knows what they want this well my life has fallen apart.
Well cool that's what you don't want.
You don't want your life to fall apart.
So what do you want.
Well the one life balance.
I just want some calm in my life I just want some clarity and a direction.
Perhaps I might want a meaningful vision for a future.
Fantastic.
How about size share with you.
The goal setting workbook or the life balance workbook.
This is going to enable you if you spent half an hour 45 minutes reflecting through it and to break
your life down into seven main areas so you can then identify the actual specific areas in your life
that you want to improve upon.
This is going to give us context for setting some goals and then defining what the action steps are
so you can start progressing towards these goals.
Incidentally there's nothing complicated about this process.
It's a very very simple process.
First things first establish what people want right.
Sometimes people want a vision.
So share with them that vision exercise help them to decide who it is that they want to be remembered
as being then.
Then we come onto the practicalities the goals.
Then we look at what they actually want in the seven main areas of their life.
Once we've defined what these goals are is very very simple to establish action plans and action plans
or just simply them reflecting upon whether they can fulfill the goals by themselves whether they need
other people.
If this money resources that they need I'll share with you a template and a video was a follow as well.
We've done all of the hard work so you don't have to you can take these resources and start sharing
them with other people pretty much right away.
But here's the thing.
Action plan is crucial.
This is gonna be stage 4 of the goal setting process.
Then as we go and want to share with you an idea here.
Right.
And this is that's the coaching relationship can sometimes evolve.
No I've worked with clients before in the past through a season or a stage of their life.
Right.
That perhaps might have had.
They might have come to me in a place of complete uncertainty without vision without clarity without
direction of what they actually want to be invest the time into.
So perhaps you know four or five six weeks succession something like this and they're walking away clear
they've got a vision for the future for who they want to be they know who they are today they're starting
to understand and themselves on a values level they know what the priorities are in life and they look
at all the goals they want to set through their values they're making values based decisions no rather
than emotionally led ones.
All right which tends to lead us into all sorts of undesirable circumstances and outcomes in life.
What I'm saying is your clients aren't going to get it right away.
All right.
So what I will sometimes do not nothing for all clients.
Some clients perhaps are starting to grow in confidence in their ability to take responsibility for
themselves and pursue their goals and take action and all that kind of thing.
But sometimes just want a little bit of accountability.
So what I will do sometimes not all the time is once a once at once a coach an agreement has come to
an end say six sessions or six weeks or something like that.
Remember how we talked about redefining the relationship towards the end of the last section.
What I'll sometimes do it.
So how rowboats Am I rather than caught sure every week or every every two weeks.
How about such a relationship changes and I just hold you more to account and more of a mentoring context.
All right.
So fees and all that kind of stuff still apply if you are charging for your fortune or your Mandarin.
But rather than them coming to you and you're here actively helping them to solve problems.
Mentoring is more about just establishing.
Okay so source why have they gone back into their own ways you might share with them your own experiences.
It might be more practical by nature.
For example if a person comes to me asking you know how do I build a business where do I start.
Well for me it's not really.
I could offer them some some some business coaching and which might be appropriate but sometimes the
is really ready to go.
They don't really have any then holding them back.
So.
So mentoring is more appropriate.
All right.
So it's entirely up to you just to work this out for yourself as well.
Relationships will evolve over over time but Stage 5 is all about reviewing where your client site and
then is adapting and adjusting yourself as appropriate.
All right.
I can't give you much more than this to be honest with you.
You just have to work out what is appropriate on a client by client basis which comes with practice.
All right.
I do guarantee it s so.
That's what's a hard to work without any strategy or goal.
Looks like you've ever known anyone who's just constantly.
Oh I'm working hard I'm working hard I'm working hard and working hard.
Oh just so stressed I was so busy working hard.
Generally people who you'll find working so hard like this don't have a strategy or a clearly defined
end goal.
This working hard hoping that something works out right and this is kind of what the five stage goal
setting process allows people to do allows them to bring structure and order.
And reason into their life's so well you find this interesting.
So just give you context for what we'll be sharing in the next couple of clips.